Bessyboo, Queen of the Purple-Eyed Creatures (bessyboo) wrote,
Bessyboo, Queen of the Purple-Eyed Creatures

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Songs and Poems

The Florists Who Don't Do Anything
Remembered from somewhere by gaiamyles, parody of this song

We are the Florists Who Don't Do Anything!
We just stay at home and mind the shop.
And if you ask us if we do anything, we'll just tell you...
We don't do anything.

Well, I'm not a paid assassin , I don't have a kitty code name,
and I've never sliced a mission target open with my claw,
See, I only work the day shift, and I'm not a secret agent,
and I've never seen a Takatori fall.

'Cause we're the Florists Who Don't Do Anything!
We just stay home and mind the shop.
And if you ask us if we do anything, we'll just tell you...
We don't do anything.

And I've never flung a garrote and I don't wear bondage clothing,
and I've never had a Schreient lady up against the wall,
and I'm never undercover and I've never hit on Omi--
And I've never seen a Takatori fall.

'Cause we're the Florists Who Don't Do Anything!
We just stay at home and mind the shop.
And if you ask us if we do anything, we'll just tell you...
We don't do anything!

Well, I've never had to cross-dress, and I've never hacked a program,
I just drive go-cart deliveries back and forth from City Hall,
and I never frenched my sister and I'm NOT a Takatori,
and I've never seen a Takatori fall!

Huh? What are you talking about? A Takatori?
And who ever kissed their sister? That's just nonsense! Why even bring it up? Am I right? What do you think?

I think you look gay. Your hair color's not natural, is it?

He dyes it.

Do not!

And I've never dyed my hair red and I don't use Manic Panic,
I don't wear my sister's jewelry and I'm really not this tall,
and I've never shouted "shi-ne!" and I don't jump off of buildings...

And we've never seen a Takatori fallllllllll!

The Prologue
By Anne Bradstreet (as read in my English class)

To sing of wars, of captains, and of kings,
Of cities founded, commonwealth begun,
For my mean pen are too superior things:
Or how they all, or each their dates have run
Let poets and historians set these forth,
My obscure lines shall not so dim their worth.

But when my wond'ring eyes and envious heart
Great Bartas sugared lines do but read o'er,
Fool I do grudge the Muses did not part
"Twixt him and me that overfluent store;
A Bartas can do what a Bartas will
But simple I according to my skill.

From schoolboy's tongue no rhetoric we expect,
Nor yet a sweet consort from broken strings,
Nor perfect beauty where's a main defect;
My foolish, broken, blemished Muse so sings,
And this to mend, alas, no art is able,
"Cause nature made it so irreparable.

Nor can I, like that fluent sweet tongued Greek
Who lisped at first, in future times speak plain.
By art he gladly found what he did seek,
A full requital of his striving pain.
Art can do much, but this maxim's most sure:
A weak or wounded brain admits no cure.

I am obnoxious to each carping tongue
Who says my hand a needle better fits,
A poet's pen all scorn I should thus wrong,
For such despite they cast on female wits;
If what I do prove well, it won't advance,
They'll say it's stol'n, or else it was by chance.

But sure the antique Greeks were far more mild
Else of our sex, why feigned they those nine
And poesy made Calliope's own child;
So 'mongst the rest they placed the arts divine;
But this weak knot they will full soon untie,
The Greeks did nought, but play the fools and lie.

Let Greeks be Greeks, and women what they are
Men have precedency and still excel,
It is but vain unjustly to wage war;
Men can do best, and women know it well.
Preeminence in all and each is yours;
Yet grant some small acknowledgment of ours.

And oh ye high flown quills that soar the skies,
And ever with your prey still catch your praise,
If e'er you deign these lowly lines your eyes,
Give thyme or parsley wreath, I ask no bays;
This mean and unrefined ore of mine
Will make your glist'ring gold but more to shine.


What HP character do you think I am?


My LiveJournal 12 Days
My True Love gave to me...
12 green_griffin1s a-spamming.
11 thesploggyists a-twisting.
10 avirias a-wiggling.
9 louifees a-hacking.
8 catsmeats a-squeezing.
7 mollymidnights a-glaring.
6 gaiamyless a-bowing.
5 dark blue solar__eclipses.
4 sniffing beauvoirs.
3 Persian moonlingmaids.
2 iguana nikunantesukis.
And a jiffy_spiffy in a durian tree.
Get gifts! Username:
Another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern.


SqueakyReptile: 'Lo.
Lady Bessyboo: Hey. I need to talk to you.
SqueakyReptile: Uh-oh…
SqueakyReptile: You need me to off someone?
SqueakyReptile: I charge.
Lady Bessyboo: HAHAHA…I want a discount! (J/K)
Lady Bessyboo: No, really, it's about science.
SqueakyReptile: You want Skinner gone?
Lady Bessyboo: YES!!! That's not exactly what I was talking about, but what's the estimate on that?
Lady Bessyboo: ;)
SqueakyReptile: Let's say…
SqueakyReptile: Two grand.
SqueakyReptile: Depends how long it'll take.
Lady Bessyboo: Make it one and a half.
SqueakyReptile: No. 1750.
Lady Bessyboo: How long would it take on 1750?
SqueakyReptile: I could probably accidentally spill the wrong liquid into the wrong container in the upcoming lab O:)…Two days, say?
Lady Bessyboo: Hmm…two days may be worth the extra 250…;)
Lady Bessyboo: *strokes beard*
SqueakyReptile: But, seriously. What did you need help with? We can fantasize about magistricide later.
Lady Bessyboo: Yes, right. Lab procedure.

Danie: But what do you think the universe (or rather, multiverse) is?
Me: I'm not sure, Danie. When you visit it, you can come back and tell me.


This lovely layout, WHICH, I might add, is COMPLETELY made by ME, *AND* it's public! So what are you waiting for? If you've got a paid account, here are the keys to upload it:

Lastn: 524478
Friends: 539653
Calendar: 539667
Day: 539665

I'm very willing to help with any problems you might have uploading/customizing it.

Wellllllllp, that's all, folks! I think that's enough to make up for my absence ;) School's just about killed me XD

Until next time, purple-eyed creatures!


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